Thursday, August 28, 2014

I can't make this stuff up.

Harper was playing outside when she came in from the garage. She was all Elsa-fied in her Frozen dress (that she dragged out of the laundry basket because she has worn it to filth), and I noticed that her hair was brushed. I said, "Wow, you look lovely. Did you brush your hair?" She responded, "Mommy, I need to show you something."

I followed the queen out to the garage and she picked something off the floor. It was a wand. Wait, no, what am I seeing? She was holding a toilet wand.

She brushed her hair with a toilet wand.

MY DAUGHTER BRUSHED HER HAIR WITH A TOILET WAND.

While dressed as Queen Elsa. A very filthy Queen Elsa.

By the grace of God the toilet wand was brand new. She found it in a bag of things I bought from the store but left in the garage.

Regardless, it left me with that shaky feeling like when you almost get into a car accident but you don't and you're not sure if you pooped yourself and you drive home trembling, "praisejesuspraisejesuspraisejesuspraisejesus."

Because toilet wand and hair. Eww.

And now I look at all things Elsa and want to barf.

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