Tuesday, March 20, 2012

So how is it being a mother of three?

I get this question often.

I'm a little over five weeks into this new gig, and I still don't know how to answer it.

Let me keep it real.

My BRAIN.IS.MUSH.

You've heard of pregnancy brain, right? Well a friend once told me that pregnancy brain never goes away even after you have kids. She was right. But what she failed to tell me is that with each kid, I would get dumber. Not dumber in the IQ sense but dumber in the "oh my gosh, I'm going to forget one of my kids at the grocery store" sense. And no, I haven't done that.

Yet.

Here are a just a few examples of the effect my mushy brain has had on my still living and breathing family.

During my first week home with Miss Greta I left the house without the diaper bag. Twice. Two nights in a row. You'd think I would have learned the first time I left the house without the necessities of traveling with a child who poops through clothes, spits up constantly and requires an endless supply of baby wipes. Not to mention, this nursing mom doesn't go anywhere without her nursing cover. Unless I want to get my Mardi Gras on.

And just today I thought I was getting ahead of the game when I sprayed down the entire bathtub with bleach-infused 409 cleanser. I insisted that my husband bathe the kids this evening as our early summer has taken a toll under their fingernails and on the bottoms of their pigs. As I could hear my children splashing in the bathtub, it hit me. I never rinsed out the bathtub. It was still caked with bleach-infused 409. And now my precious little minis were swimming in it. Of course at the time of this realization I was nursing. So I took my baby-latched-to-boob and bolted up the stairs screaming, "Get the kids out of the bathtub!" The look my husband gave me said it all. I had lost my ever loving mind. I was showerless, spit-up stained, droopy eyed, and now running up the stairs topless while screaming. And you thought Kony 2012s Jason Russell went off the deep? He ain't got nothin' on this crazy lady.

But my husband is a gracious man. As he stared at me and all my lunacy, he knew his best bet was to scoop the kids out of the tub and not say another word.

Oh, and have you heard about the cake incident?

My dear cousin baked me a scrumptious chocolate cake for my 32nd birthday (love ya, Lis). She generously gave me the leftover cake contained perfectly in a plastic cake caddy. Finding no room to store it in my kitchen, I thoughtlessly threw it in the oven knowing I'd pull it out the next morning for breakfast (I'm 32. I can eat whatever I darn well please for breakfast, thankyouverymuch).

But I didn't. Breakfast turned into lunch and realizing my children might starve if I didn't feed them fast, I turned on the oven so that I could serve them an overwhelmed mother's dream meal: frozen pizza.

And then it happened.

You know when people ask you how you are doing after having a baby, and the cliche answer is something like, "If everybody is alive by the end of the day, then we succeeded," well those words have never rung so true as the day that I almost burned down the house because of my birthday cake.


But we are all alive and still in one piece. And no thanks to me.

Because being a mother of three ain't always pretty. In fact, it's usually very very messy. And it requires a heck of a lot more brain cells than I have left (no thanks to my early 20s).




Seriously and truly all thanks be to God. He is the only reason we are surviving. And as evidenced by these pictures, these precious little lives are worth every humbling lunatic moment I've endured and will endure.

Bring.
It.
On.

32 comments:

  1. Sounds like you are doing great,I should know I have 4 kids under the age of 6!

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    1. You are my hero. 4 under 6. Ah-mazing.

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  2. I feel the need to apologize for my part in the early 20s brain cell loss.
    -Coley

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    1. Don't apologize. Those memories make me laugh. Hard. And I need all the laughter I can get.

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  3. They are totally adorable and I can most definitely relate! My kids are all very close in age, so I lived through those years, too. And I'm sure my husband has plenty of stories to tell on me. I have, thankfully, blacked them out. Heh.

    The kids are 15, 17, and 18 now. And they just KNOW I'm so dumb. Rotten children. Ha!

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    1. You survived and are now in the thick of the emotional challenges - so there is hope for me?! Thanks for the encouragement.

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  4. Sitting here laughing...and wondering who cleaned the oven....maybe it is not clean yet! Love your truth, wit and humor, Ali!

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  5. Love this Ali. Several of us have had a good laugh as I read it to them. You have been blessed with such a way to express your thoughts and feelings. I Iove your honesty.
    Wish I could meet this sweet babies. Miss you, Janet

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    1. Thanks for your encouragement! Miss ya, Janet.

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  6. This is too funny. I can totally identify with the cake episode. I didn't even have the excuse of a pregnancy brain or having 3 kids. I wish I could say it happened at my house, but sad to say it happened at my soon to be mother-in-laws. You think I would have learned my lesson after the first time, but no, it took 2 times till I finally remembered to always look in the oven before turning it on :)
    You are doing a great job with those sweet little kiddos!

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    1. You are a kindred spirit, LaRonda. Love ya, friend.

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  7. Thanks for the laugh! I only have one kiddo so far, but, oh do I remember the sleep deprivation days. They are terrible. I'm a little bummed to hear that I'm only going to get dumber with each new kiddo that comes along. But, I'm sure there will be plenty of stories to share with others to give them a good laugh.

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    1. But think of all the wonderful ways we get smarter - no one can multi-task as well as a mom! We could put a Ringling Brothers Circus juggler to shame.

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  8. You are a beautiful crazy mess. And that mess is exactly what I love about you. 1 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about it.

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    1. Praise Jesus!!! (LOVE that verse.)

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  9. I adore you! I love you and this makes me feel a bit better about things that happen in my house as a single mother of one...(poison control anyone?)

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    1. Been there, friend, been there :)

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  10. That cake picture is awesome. And your babies are beautiful.

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    1. Morgan said it looks like a jellyfish :)

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  11. Man, you've got one heck of an exciting life! Your stories and pictures rock my world!

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  12. We just found out that we're expecting #3 in October, a few weeks before my son turns two and a few months before my daughter turns 4. Jess Seed forwarded me this post and I just wanted to say thanks for sharing. Although I don't know you it's always an encouragement to find commonality in fellow moms and believers. I got a good laugh, followed by a bit of a panic attack, followed by assurance that God is in control and has put me on this path. Thanks be to Him.

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    1. Praise God for your newest baby!!! I am thrilled. I simply love babies - even those I don't know :) Thanks for the encouragement - it made my day.

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  13. Your family is adorable! How do you do it all? Please tell me there is some yelling and crying to make me feel a bit better (since it happens at my house with only ONE child)! :-)

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    1. How do I do it all? Clearly I'm not! I'm burning the house down and bathing my kids in toxic chemicals :)

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  14. Okay, that’s so awesome. I totally would do all of that! Eat cake for breakfast, AND melt the cake carrier in the oven too. You poor thing. I can’t imagine the profanity that came out when you realized what you had done. Glad to know I’m not the only one with a screw loose ;-)

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    1. Tonia - I've got multiple screws loose. It's a miracle I'm still intact.

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  15. It's Jill on my moms phone laughing hysterically!! Just this morning I looked for my sunglasses for an hour when I realized they were on top of my head, lost my keys and later found them tucked in my shoes in my closet and forgot to feed one of mine lunch. Today. Which I'd say is typical

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  16. Oops - me again! Anyway, I'm just proud you cleaned your tub;) luv u Ali!!!! U r such a gifted writer!

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  17. Reading this was my life as Alyssa was growing up. Now I see why you were so close when you lived in LA. She speaks so highly of you. I am so happy to check out your blog. Diane T.

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