Thursday, June 4, 2009

Non-Maternal Instincts

Nonmaternal Instinct

This is why I pray for a self-cleaning baby.
Baby, I don't blame you, chocolate should be smeared madly across the face . . .

. . . hands, arms . . .

. . . legs and body.

Frankly, I'm jealous that I don't give myself the freedom and opportunity to eat chocolate like that more often (if ever). God knows I wear enough of it on my hips, why not make it my elbows and knees while I'm at it.

But the difference between you and me, son, is that I have the ability to clean myself. As for you, well, it is up to my ability to clean you. 

And that is why this chocolate-covered pretzel debacle drives me wonky. 

Not to mention that too-cute-for-words mini Buckeye chair (equipped with a cup holder!), and your brand-spankin' new blue onesie that makes you look more precious than I could have ever imagined. Yes, those things don't clean themselves either.

So one teeny, tiny chocolate-covered pretzel disaster later (thank you, mother, for indulging him), I'm busy at work cleaning baby, baby chair, baby clothes, and myself (because chocolate-covered baby equals chocolate-covered mommy).

It's days like this that I thank God for warm weather and a sturdy hose.


  1. That's just ONE pretzel??
    Wow, Henry.

  2. That's hilarious Ali! I just found your blog, and I'm so impressed! I love your design. See you Sunday!

  3. oh this is too precious! i love it! i'm trying to figure out "non-maternal instincts"?? i'll snoop around some more,...